The universe works in mysterious ways. You could be searching for THE ONE for years, only to be met with one disastrous date after another.  You’re not even asking for much, at least someone who can carry a conversation!

One day, hope chimes in the form of a notification! (It’s 2021 how else are we supposed to meet new people?) 

It’s the hottie you’ve been talking to finally asking you out on a date.

Thinking it can’t be worse than your last date who kept saying LOL and LMAO out loud, you say yes! After all, a boozy night out wining and dining in town sounds just like your kind of thing. 

Then, a few (reasonable amount of) dates later, you realise you’re falling HARD. Everything about your new lover is electric. Their touch, voice, and those gentle yet piercing eyes triggers an infatuation you can’t describe. It’s also the way they make you feel safe yet all tingly inside.

Whatever this feeling is, you want to keep it!  And you want to keep this gem of a human being in your life.

To help you out, we thought you’d appreciate some tips that answer the questions  ‘How to maintain relationships?’ and ‘How to build a healthy relationship?’. So get cosy, and let’s explore!


Healthy relationship tips for couples

1. Spend as much time as possible with each other

Source: Love Panky

Love, otherwise known as that unexplainable electric sensation, is initiated through stimuli. Case in point: You still can’t get enough of your lover even though you’ve spent the last weekend shacked up together.

Sustaining this feeling is important, and you can achieve it simply by spending even more time together, yay! 

During the first few months are always the most exhilarating because the connection is euphoric. You put off everyone in your life just so you can spend off days with your boo. 

But when you can no longer ignore your ‘real life’ responsibilities (plus 8 missed calls from ma), always remember to make time!


2. Embrace your differences

Source: Healthline

As humans, it’s our nature to gravitate towards people with similar interests to our own. It’s just our primal instincts working to keep us in safe territory. 

While that has gotten you this far, you’re probably not experiencing what life has to offer to the fullest.

Unless you’re twins separated at birth, you’re bound to have some differences with your partner and that’s okay! Your differences are probably what drew you to each other anyway.

By opening up, learning, and living from each other’s perspective of life, you will have varied experiences to take on not just life itself, but you will have a clear understanding of where your relationship is headed. 


3. Find common ground

Embracing each other’s differences is one thing, another thing is finding things you love doing together. Happy couples tend to enjoy being around each other no matter what they’re doing. 

Even so, doing something you love together would make it that much meaningful. Simply doing everyday things together like enjoying meals, chilling, doing groceries, and watching something together also counts!


4. Respect each other

Source: CogniFit

When you ask couples who have been married 40, 50 years how to keep a relationship strong and happy, the first thing they talk about is respect. 

The respect you have for each other can cushion your relationship from the uncomfortable impacts of human fallibility. Respect makes you believe in each other often even more than yourselves, and more importantly, have faith in each other. 

Once there is respect, not even distance nor time can separate you. 


5. Cultivate trust and understanding

Source: Mom Junction

Trust, something a lot of us seem to have an issue with. It’s not an easy thing to earn especially if your heart has been stomped on too many times before. 

But being played also has its benefits because while you never cried so hard and listened to Adele so much in your life, the experience helps you to grow in many ways.

And once the right person comes along, you will know to trust them almost instinctively, despite whatever heartbreak you went through in the past.

Because trust and faith is cultivated from respect. If you hold someone to a high esteem, you trust that the person will always do their best while having you in mind, and vice versa. 


6. Love yourself too


Before committing into any relationship head on, it’s important to first learn to love yourself. It isn’t anyone’s responsibility to make you happy except yourself. 

Granted, it isn’t an easy task. But once you begin to see things clearly about yourself and come to terms with all the good and the bad, you will find some clarity, simultaneously receiving a boost of strength and confidence. 

And my is it contagious! Once you exude this type of energy and embrace positive thinking, the law of attraction works to reward you with even more positive energy. Thank you universe! 

Once you learn to like yourself, loving and caring for someone else comes naturally, and with no strings attached. 


7. Communicate! Effectively. 

Source: Dialogue Coaching

Communication is the foundation to any healthy relationship. No matter how long you’ve been together, your partner won’t know that you’re having a bad day if you’re just walking around the apartment stomping your feet. 

If you want something from your partner, you should be able to be upfront about anything and communicate it effectively.  

Of course, it’s not always easy to talk about your needs. But look at it from your partner’s perspective, they want to be there for you and even find it a pleasure making you happy. 


8. Grow together


Finding the person of your dreams doesn’t mean it’s time to hang up your personal goals and aspirations. Most couples tend to gain new found motivation in achieving them because they see a clearer horizon ahead. 

Love can be a good motivator when you’ve found someone you want to spend the rest of your life with because not only are you on this journey for yourself, but you’ve also found someone who’s willing to be part of it. 

And boy is it sweet to come home from a long day of growing and kicking ass to someone who’s as excited to see you too!


9. Physical intimacy 

Source: Dr. Gayle Friend

We already know that touch is an important stimulus. But did you know that affectionate, physical connection activates the ‘love hormone’ – Oxytocin.

You probably didn’t need another reason to be all over your boo, but Oxytocin is associated with trust, empathy, sexual activity, bonding, and relationship building. It’s basically a miracle drug for love!

So, touch each other as much as you can to keep the love hormones pumping! 

There are many ways to be physically affectionate other than the usual rumpy pumpy. Sex is a big factor, but it isn’t everything. Hold hands, hug, kiss, make out, cuddle!


10. Emotional intimacy

Source: Mom Junction

Having said that, it isn’t always physical because actual intimacy is in the day to day minutia. 

The smaller, adorable things that you do for one another without even much thought, just because you want to make them happy! 

It could be something as simple as always ensuring they stay hydrated or preparing their toothbrush in the morning. Don’t let little intimacies like these go unnoticed. 


11. Have realistic expectations.

Or better yet, have no expectations at all! 

You’re not going to be completely gaga over each other 24/7, there’s bound to be ups and downs. That’s just life. 

So rather than setting expectations for each other which we can sometimes do subconsciously, treasure each other and each day that comes.

In other cliche words – go with the flow, and be prepared to take on whatever good or bad that life throws at your relationship. 


12. Learn to forgive

Source: CBN

Love is shutting up whenever there’s an opportunity to say ‘I told you so’, and learning to forgive when mistakes are made. 

Your partner, already ashamed and waiting for you to rub it in their face, will surely appreciate it if you just bite your tongue and say ‘baby don’t worry about it’.

Now that you have initiated this positive feedback loop of love and forgiveness, both sides will feel comfortable in being completely open and honest with each other as the relationship blossoms. 


At the end of the day, 

Remember that it takes two to tango. You could be putting out all the right energies, signs, and using the healthy relationship tips for couples above to make your lover stay. 

But if the person you want so badly isn’t even on the same wavelength, no matter how many articles you read on how to keep a relationship strong and happy, you will never find the golden answer.

In that case, it’s probably not worth it! 

Take it from us, learn from the experience, heal, grow, and move on. 

And when you’re ready to get back on the saddle and explore a whole new world of opportunities, give Sugarbook a visit!For more dating tips and advice, also head to the Sugarbook blog today!