A sugar arrangement is meant to be fulfilling and mutually beneficial to both parties involved.
When it comes to what makes a successful sugar relationship, it boils down to two things — a genuine connection and the allowance (aka the sugar) from the sugar parent to the sugar baby.
For this article, we want to highlight how to go about discussing the allowance element in your sugar relationship.
For those of you in the dark, an allowance is the compensation that a sugar parent provides to their sugar baby for their time and effort spent in the relationship.
An allowance comes in the form of cash and there are usually additional benefits such as luxury goods, lavish trips and expensive dinners. The sugar parent can also offer allowances in the form of supporting their sugar baby’s living cost such as rent, tuition fees and transportation fees.
Now that you’ve gotten a clearer picture, what are the types of allowances that are usually found in a sugar arrangement? And which one is more suitable for you?
Types of Allowances
💰 Pay-per-meet (PPM)
In a pay-per-meet, the sugar parent gives the sugar baby a specified amount per date. A date usually constitutes a meal and spending time with the sugar parent.
Depending on how far you have progressed in the relationship, the date can also include spending the night with your sugar partner.
However, sex is not a must and you should never feel pressured into it.
If you’re uncomfortable about it, just be upfront with your sugar partner before going on a date and make sure you guys are on the same page.
At the end of the date, the sugar baby will receive the amount that was previously arranged and agreed on. FYI, the amount should be discussed before you get into a sugar relationship together.
This works if the sugar parent is someone who is very busy and might not have the time to meet on a frequent basis. So instead of a monthly allowance, the sugar parent only provides the allowance each time they meet with their sugar baby.
This arrangement is also good for those who are just getting started in sugaring and they are still testing the waters. This is also suitable for those who are not in the same country as their sugar partner.
A pay-per-meet is more flexible for both parties and you can discuss this arrangement again when you feel more comfortable with the sugar lifestyle.
The amount varies for a pay-per-meet but the average amount is about SGD500. However, it’s been known that it can even go up to SGD1,000! It all depends on how you negotiate.
Of course, this amount is negotiable and we would advise that you talk about this before you meet face to face.
💰 Monthly allowance
As implied, a monthly allowance is an allowance that the sugar parent gives their sugar baby on a monthly basis.
It’s a sum of money that the sugar baby can use for whatever they need. In return, the sugar baby will spend time with their sugar parent on a more regular basis.
You might meet weekly or bi-weekly. You might spend the day together or even have sleepovers. It all depends on the sugar parent’s schedule and whether the sugar baby can accommodate it.
This arrangement works for those who are more experienced in the sugar sphere and for those who know what they want in a sugar relationship.
Setting up a monthly allowance is definitely more hassle-free and it indicates that there is trust and communication in your relationship to allow for such an arrangement.
The average monthly allowance that sugar babies on Sugarbook make is SGD$2,500. Again, this amount is negotiable. Ideally, the allowance should be proportional to the time, effort and attention the sugar baby spends on the sugar relationship.
💰 Experiences and gifts
There are some sugar parents who prefer not to give an allowance in terms of cash, instead they provide experiences such as fine dining, hotel stays and glamorous vacations.
They will also buy the latest gadgets, luxury items and whatever the sugar baby wants as gifts. They might even pay for the sugar baby’s living costs such as rent, tuition fees, transportation fees, etc.
This form of allowance is also more suitable for sugar babies (or what we term the business-minded sugar babies) looking for a way to enter the higher-tiered society.
Usually this is already a part of the sugar relationship because sugar parents like to spoil and pamper their sugar babies.
However, you could still come across some sugar parents or sugar babies who prefer this kind of arrangement. It would be up to both parties to decide if this is something they can accept.
Well, the amount would depend on what kind of experience it is. In terms of gifts, sugar babies have been known to receive branded items, new phones and even flown to the sugar parent’s location.
Depending on the sugar baby’s needs, sugar parents can also offer to help with their tuition fees and rent. If the sugar baby is hoping to learn a new skill or try out a new hobby, the sugar parent can also support them through monetary means.
How To Set Your Allowance
We’ve talked about the types of allowances available but how would you set these especially if it’s your first time in a sugar relationship?
Well, here are a few factors to take into consideration:
1) How often you are expected to meet up
The frequency of meet-ups can vary — from 2 times a month to 2 to 3 times a week. It depends on both your availability and how much time you want to spend together.
If you don’t meet up that often, you can opt for a PPM but if you meet more frequently, you can ask for a monthly allowance instead.
2) The level of intimacy you desire
This is something that you need to talk honestly about with your sugar partner at the beginning of the relationship. Naturally, the more intimate the relationship, the allowance should also reflect that.
Things can also change as the sugar relationship progresses — you might not want any kind of intimacy at first but change your mind later on. When that happens, the allowance should change as well.
3) Amount of experience
When it comes to sugar babies, the more experienced they are, the higher the allowance they can ask for. This is how the sugar bowl works. As a sugar baby, if you think you deserve more, don’t be afraid to voice out and communicate with your sugar parents.
|Also read: The Essential Sugar Dating Guideline|
We hope this allowance guide provided clarity and how to go about discussing the allowance part of your sugar relationship.
Remember, it is important that you iron out these details before committing to a sugar arrangement. It might be awkward to do it but the best time to talk about this is on your first date.
Speaking about first dates, here are some precautions to take when you meet up face to face during this pandemic.
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