“My Sugar Daddy Is Way Older Than Me” – Dating Someone Much Older, From A Sugar Baby’s Perspective

As societies become more open-minded, more people are becoming accepting of the fact that love can exist in many forms. Unfortunately, many people still judge couples with a significant age difference. 

Age gap relationships in sugar dating

Sugar relationships typically involve partners with significant age gaps. Sugar daddies/mommies can fund a sugar baby’s lifestyle without causing a dent in their wallet, so they tend to be more successful and experienced in life, which means they’re typically older (although this isn’t always the case these days).

On the other hand, sugar babies are typically young adults just starting out in life and looking for a way to make extra money. Younger sugar babies also happen to be what sugar daddies/mommies look for in their pursuit of companionship.

The perspective of the sugar baby

We wanted to hear about a sugar baby’s experience regarding this and luckily, our paths crossed with Debbie (22), a sugar baby who lives between Malaysia and Singapore. She’s been a sugar baby for 3 years and is currently in a two-year relationship with her long-time sugar daddy (48). Here’s what we’ve learned:

Society’s Perspective 

Beyond the stereotypes associated with being a sugar baby, individuals in such relationships may also face the challenge of people’s perceptions when dating an older partner.

“When you’re seen being close to someone older, some people may immediately assume you’re solely interested in their financial support. While there is an element of financial assistance in sugar relationships, it’s essential to remember that our connections go beyond that. The judgments and whispers can be hurtful at times,” Debbie reflects.

She goes on to share that during her initial sugar dates, the attention from onlookers made her uncomfortable.

With time, she learned to cope with this societal pressure and negative reactions. Meeting her sugar daddy provided her with a source of happiness, and they consistently enjoyed their time together. Debbie has grown stronger, and while occasional comments or snickers can still be disheartening, she has found her inner resilience.

Emotional dynamics

In terms of the challenges of being with an older man, Debbie shares that it’s actually quite manageable. 

“Having been with both younger and older men, I’ve found that there are no significant challenges of dating someone older. The challenge is dating a man!” she jokes. 

“Sure, he sometimes doesn’t get my references, but it happens to me, too, and we just laugh about it. In fact, I find it refreshing to be with someone more mature. For instance, my long-time sugar daddy has become my mentor. He helps me when I’m stuck in life and offers fresh perspectives based on his experiences.”

“Meanwhile, I feel like I bring excitement into his life, which is what sugar daddies/mommies are looking for in sugar dating – someone to make their life more interesting.”

Overcoming challenges and finding balance

At the end of the day, Debbie shares that it’s all about perspective and having a good support system. 

“I felt all alone at the beginning of my journey, but thanks to the internet, I’ve connected with sugar sisters, and we now share a bond that’s stronger than family. Thanks to this support system, I can share my pains and find comfort in knowing that there are people out there going through what I’m facing. We help each other through problems, we motivate each other when one of us is feeling down, and we’re always there for each other.”

“After going out with a few daddies, I got used to the judgments, and honestly, no one can stop me from reaching my goals.”

“This helped me to change my perspective, and knowing that I have the power to control my life, I started fully getting into the “role” of a sugar baby, and since then, my experience has been mostly positive!”

Besides this support system, Debbie was also lucky to have met nice sugar daddies by being careful and talking to potential candidates via the phone before meeting up. 

“Online dating is risky because you can never be 100% sure that the person on the other side is genuine. To protect myself, I read up on all the blogs and articles on ways to protect myself, and I wait until I get to know the person for some time before meeting up with them.”

Debbie stresses that while being paid is the end goal, you shouldn’t accept every proposition laid out before you. 

“One time, I met a sugar daddy for the first time, and I immediately felt that the vibes were off. Even though I needed the money then, my gut feeling told me that the guy was fishy, so I trusted my gut and did not proceed with the arrangement.”

All in all, Debbie says that the key to a successful and good time in the sugar bowl is just having a thick face and owning it!

“People will always have something to say no matter what you do. But as a sugar baby, you have goals and know what you’re working towards. Other people can say whatever they want, but only you know the truth, so why let what others say bring you down?”

“Finding your girls (sugar sisters) and sticking with them was what really helped me through the initial rough patch. So if you’re new to the game and feel lonely, try searching online to find your sisters.”

We’ve learned that being a sugar baby is all about having the guts and bravery to stay above the noise. Although this takes some learning and getting used to, having a support system such as a community of sugar sisters will help you to feel less lonely. 

The initial stage is always the most challenging since you’re navigating unfamiliar territories. But as long as you keep an open mind, have clear boundaries, and always remain extra careful with everyone you encounter, you can have a happy and successful age-gap sugar relationship

Think you have what it takes to become a sugar baby? Give it a try at Sugarbook today!

You can also find out more before diving in by checking out our other articles:

Top 10 Questions to Ask Your Potential Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby

Sugar Dating: How To Avoid ‘Salt Daddies’ 2023